Indefinite holes and episodes.

Go back into your memories. Is there anything you wish you hadn't done? Or something you wish you had done instead of doing what you did? Go back and do not hesitate. You will find that everything you have done is perfect. Everything is as it should be, and more. Do not hesitate and answer to the questions you set aside at some time. Answer them the way you would have wanted them to be answered. Sometime, during those moments, your life turned, shifted, in a way you never expected. whether it caused you happiness, sadness, joy, or anger, it shouldn't matter. You should still be able to go on living the way you did, and never forget those episodes which made your life take a spin for a split second. Remind yourself of enjoying every minute once in a while, because everything is worth anyone's time. SMILE.

I won't give up on us.

"When I look into your eyes it's like watching the night sky, or a beautiful sunrise, well, there's so much they hold. And just like them old stars, I see that you've come so far to be right where you are, how old is your soul? 

Well, I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough. I'm giving you all my love, I'm still looking up. And when you're needing your space, to do some navigating, I'll be here patiently waiting, to see what you find. 

'Cause even the stars they burn, some even fall to the earth, we've got a lot to learn. God knows we're worth it. No, I won't give up I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily. I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make. Our differences, they do a lot to teach us how to use the tools and gifts we got, yeah. We got a lot at stake, and in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend for us to work. We didn't break, we didn't burn, we had to learn how to bend without the world caving in. I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am. 

I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough. I'm giving you all my love, I'm still looking up. Still looking up. I won't give up on us, no I'm not giving up. God knows I'm tough enough, I am tough, I am loved. We've got a lot to learn, we're alive, we are loved. God knows we're worth it, and we're worth it. I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough. I'm giving you all my love, I'm still looking up." Jason Mraz - I won't give up

The pressure of water

Silence. All I can hear is the silence that surrounds me. The sun above makes everything around me look shiny and somehow strangely familiar. I decide to stay, because I feel comforted by the sensation of the water around my body, tangling in my hair, making my skin cold. I can't breathe, but I know I will be able to resist the feeling. My face is relaxed, my hair making swirls I can't completely understand, my body trembling because of the cold water. I don't want to move, because I know that if I do, I will be pulled out of my favourite place: inside myself, thinking about everything that goes on inside my body, my mind, my own universe. I live in my own place where I know I'm happy, so the reality disappears whenever this presents itself. I don't want or need anything in this moment, I just want to enjoy the feeling of the water flowing into me, letting it enter and place itself between each cell in my body. Taking my energy back and forth and neutralizing it, absorbing every negative charge and pushing it as far from my body as possible. The sun rays make the light of my body and the water around me shine like diamonds, radiating happiness and warm brightness to the world outside. I can feel the pressure rise as I sink even more, into the depths of the water, risking everything in my body to dilate and get swallowed in the darkness beneath me. I'm getting away from the light of the sun, but every second I feel happier, because the silence is greater as I get away from the thin surface, where I know I might get tender and give in to the need of air. I can hear the music playing in my head, the wonders and colors that each sound produces before my eyes. I look up, and verify that I can still feel what I am. Now I know who I am as well. The need to burst to the surface to reality again is annoying, but I'm still happy I had that moment of brilliant and obscure silence in my head and in front of my eyes. I use the last gush of air inside my lungs to enjoy a laugh where I can feel and hear my own heart beating. Now I listen. Nothing to hear but the mumble of words turning in circles inside my head. The silence around me makes me close my eyes, as I let my body float to the surface slowly. My hair tangles in front of my face, and the top of my head enjoys the last centimetres of water which separate it from reality and the air. I push slowly out of the water, letting air gush out of and into my lungs. I'm out of myself, naked, stripped to the bone, open to everything, and into reality, to face the rest of my life. Another breath of air, which makes me pull myself together and gather strength to confront what had been, before, laid in front of me. I close my eyes again, and give my first step into my new life.

Happiness is just what you try to find, when your mind is elsewhere.

Never try to hide what you're feeling, because anything that happens you must analize, and have a friend reason with you, just to help you reconnect with your happiness.

The persuit of happiness is what you have to finally find to get on your right track.

I found you.

I can finally see where I'm headed.

Think. Believe. Convince. Know.

As I start what I believe I started, I can't see where I've gotten lately, because of what is blinding me. I can't see what I have, I can't see what I need to see... But even though I don't know, I trust, and I believe I have what I want. Let the words flow from you head to the paper, and don't mind if there's coherence between the words... Because all that matters is the intention of writing. I might not know what I have, but I do know what I believe I have. If it is so complicated, why can't I just fly away, and swim in long rivers, and across the sea, where I know I want to be? I love to let words fly away from my mouth, and pretend I have no idea what I'm writing, or talking about, when I actually do know, but what I say is incoherent. I think to start believing. I start believing, to start convincing myself about something I need to know is true. In the end, as I go though what I know, I believe what I know. So, I know what I have, and I'm sure of what I want. What I think is what I want, and what I want is what I think. Now I know.

"I know you'll never come... But I'm still waiting for you."

Winding up a new path.

Every day, I suffer a different kind of pain... One day it's too much love for one, then it's too much love for the other one. I like feeling loved, but I don't like suffering because of it... The time I have is getting shorter, and shorter, but I don't want to lose him. I want him to love me for ever, but if he'd only wait for me until I told him so... And I wish I had the power to keep them both; so that if one leaves me, I'll stay with the other one. I know that is absolutely wrong, and it shouldn't be so hard... I need to know what I'm waiting for, and what it is I want so badly from him... I hope my head clears out before something bad happens... If not, I'll miss them... Both.
I love them both... But I do not know who to choose to keep. I'm completely confused. I hate love.

It's easy for you to think that I'm thinking about you, but it's not easy for me to think that you're thinking about me.

Bed-time stories.